Hard decision

you used to be someone that is so special to me! you are some one that had really driving me crazy for loving you until i lost my direction in life. i had ever think that i can even gave up my life just for you.... how stupid i am!

those bad feeling came back again lately. i don know how it happened. it just came back naturally... but i think this time i am more mature to handle it.

it took me a few days to think about it. What am i actually waiting for? What am i looking for?

...........

I made up my mind. I made one of the most difficult decision in my life. I decided to totally get this feeling out! it is really not easy, indeed it is really hard. But when i think back all the up and down i had gone through for the pass few months, i have to do so.

.........

人生的平衡点！

I found this very meaningful, just want to share.....

Dreaming.......

I dreamt of you. You are as real as in real life.
A lot of times when I am lost and struggled in life, you always be there for me. You are the one who encouraged me the most, guided me and giving me those inspiration and motivational advices, to keep my heart contented.
A lot of times when I fall, you will definitely be there for me. You comfort me with your warmth arm, telling me that not the end of the world.
No one is perfect in this world, so do I. I always learnt from my previous mistakes; letting the experiences be the lesson of my life, improve to be a better person.
Remember what you always telling me? The most beautiful future will always depend on the need for forgetting the past. You will not be able to go from the past in life as long as you will not have overcome the errors of the past and all that hurt you.
I will always remember that, and live the life in full and always smile in sprite of difficult times.
You always have a choice when you wake up early in the morning, either to be happy or sad. When a door of the happiness is closed, another opens, but us, we continue to look at the closed door and we do not attach importance to that which we have just opened! Remember you always have the choice!

Days........

Days of sorrow, days of encouragement, days of disappoinments, days of hopes....
i had been sick for the passed one week. A signal from my body that i need some rest. Some changes lately in my life. I am trying hard to adjust and fine tune myself. I am just a normal human being with feeling and yet sometime things are just out of my control. You asked me why i have to do so? you said i will burst out one day. for your info, i am doing pretty well and moving on well too
I think i had been worry too much for you. guessed is time for me to just let it be, don think too much on behalf. Your life is in ur own hand! You will never know how bad i felt.
The new journey just started. I just need to be strong and keep moving!
Life is Beautiful!

The 4th Year!

Times flies, it turned into the 4th year.
You came into my life 4 years ago.
It might doesnt mean anything to you, but it really meant a lot to me.
At a certain point of my life, i felt so mesirable without you. You had brought the best ever happiness and memory for me, and yet u had brought the worst to me too.
When we moving on in our life, the footprints that we had left behind will always be engraved in my heart! Cheers~!

Turned 30

Turned 30 few days ago... Suddenly felt that i am old already. I am still searching around, looking for my direction in life.
I wish to have a new chapter in my life. I wish i can build up my career, and i wish my dream will come true one day!

We both worrying about you

I received a call from some one dear to me this morning
We are both worried about you. We just want you to know that you are very very close to us. We care for you, we worrying about you......

You always have the choice

In life, everyone always have the choice. You can either choose to be happy or sad, choose to loved or been loved, choose to let go or keep waiting.......
Decide for yourself and move forward!

LOVE.... Final

" 如果我還一直深愛著你...你是否還會待在我身邊?
如果我還一直在乎著你...你是否會再多看我一眼?
是否我已不存在了...你才感覺的到我的離開?
是否我已離開了....你才感覺的到我對你的好?
天下所的情人.愿你们能珍惜眼前的人,不要失去后才懂得珍惜...

LOVE continue....

我们总是以为，我们会找到一个自己很爱很爱的人。 可是後来，当我们猛然回首，我们才会发觉自己曾经多么天真。 假如从来没有开始，你怎么知道自己会不会很爱很爱那个人呢？ 其实，很爱很爱的感觉，是要在一起经历了许多事情之後才会发现的。 或许每个人都希望能够找到自己心目中百分之百的伴侣， 但是你有没有想过在你身边会不会早已经有人默默对你付出很久了，只是你没发 觉而已呢？ 所以，还是仔细看看身边的人吧！ 他或许已经等你很久喽！
当你爱一个人的时候，爱到八分绝对刚刚好。 所有的期待和希望都只有七八分；剩下两三分用来爱自己。如果你还继续爱得更多，很可能会给对方沉重的压力，让彼此喘不过气来， 完全丧失了爱情的乐趣。
爱一个人，要了解，也要开解；
要道歉，也要道谢；
要认错，也要改错；
要体贴，也要体谅；
是接受，而不是忍受；
是宽容，而不是纵容；
是支持，而不是支配；
是慰问，而不是质问；
是倾诉，而不是控诉；
是难忘，而不是遗忘；
是彼此交流，而不是凡事交代；
是为对方默默祈求， 而不是向对方诸多要求；
可以浪漫，但不要浪费；
可以随时牵手，但不要随便分手。

LOVE

爱的感觉，总是在一开始觉得很甜蜜， 总觉得多一个人陪、多一个人帮你分担， 你终於不再孤单了，至少有一个人想著你、恋著你， 不论做什么事情， 只要能一起，就是好的， 但是慢慢的，随著彼此的认识愈深， 你开始发现了对方的缺点， 於是问题一个接著一个发生， 你开始烦、累，甚至想要逃避， 有人说爱情就像在捡石头， 总想捡到一个适合自己的， 但是你又如何知道什么时候能够捡到呢？ *她适合你，那你又适合她吗? 其实，爱情就像磨石子一样， 或许刚捡到的时候，你不是那么的满意， 但是记住人是有弹性的， 很多事情是可以改变的， 只要你有心、有勇气， 与其到处去捡未知的石头， 还不如好好的将自己已经拥有的石头磨亮磨，你开始磨了吗？ 很多人以为是因为感情淡了， 所以人才会变得懒惰。 错！ 其实是人先被惰性征服， 所以感情才会变淡的

I want to tell u something,,,,

I want to tell you something
It's been lurking in my mind,
I've tried to throw it all away
But i couldn't, and I find......
Instead of it disappearing
It has stubbornly deepened
And I am sad to say right now
The situation has truly worsened.
What i really want to say
Is that my heart has fallen deep
And try as hard, as hard I may
My feelings can no longer keep,
My mind is saturated with you,
My heart wants you so bad
I'm sorry but you have to know
I'm feeling miserable and sad.
It would be great if we were friends
If you felt you could not love me
And please don't ask me to pretend
That surely would just kill me.
.....................

Dad, I'm missing you!

Dad, here i sit, alone in my room, looking out the window

The day is drab and dreary

I think of u and mum to console myself

I try to be a little cherry,

But really its just mighty tough

Not having both of you around

I miss you both more than I can say

And feel so low, so sad, so down!

Silently the sweet flowerw bloom

Silently sunlight fills the room

SIlently..........

I still can remember vividly the day, 18-12-1997.

I called to chat with you that afternoon, and you were away that evening itself.

How cruel, why?

I just want to take this opportunity to wish you HAPPY FATHER's DAY! I miss you alot!

I am confused!

Ever since that....

I don't want to be in love, again,

Not after last time, not after such pain,

But I'm unable to resist the loneliness.....

When the night comes, and when i am alone in the room.....

I don't want to get hurt so soono once more,

But without love what is life for?

Yet, i am so worry some one will break my fragile heart again....

It;s already been broken in too many parts!

I am confused!

When i see you again..

When i see you again.. i felt the pain. i realized i am yet to forget about you. You always in my mind.
530

u... someone who is so important to me...

When i was chatting with you just now, i keep dropping my tears. i am not sure why.

You might say that i still holiding on, some one may said that why i still cant let go.

Honestly, i already let go and move on.

i tears off becos first, i do still miss you a lot. and i am worry about you too. it is pain when you are worry so much about some one, but you do not know wat you can do, it is so helpless.

i sincerely wish you good luck and all the best in your future undertaking....

The four things

In life, there are four things that we shouldnt break, that is TRUST, PROMISE, RELATION & HEART. This is because when they break, they don't make noise but pains a lot.

5 months....

it has been 5 months... u came into my dream last night. it was really sweet... i was hugging u..

anyway... i had been moving on very well lately. that life.

i feel good to see you living on happily also.

you are always in my mind...

i just want to share this.....

i find this is so meaningful.. and i just want to share with you.... this is one of the comments in my blog.

"有些东西，有些事，有些人，你越想把他忘记，你就是一世都忘不了。有时候，不再对这些东西那么执著，试着去放开，反而心里也会好过一点。一段受伤的感情，就好像伤口一样，会痛，但总会有痊愈的一天。但当伤口差不多完全痊愈的时候，请不要再去撕开那些疤，不然伤口永远不会好起来。当然，伤口痊愈了，总会留下疤痕。那是个感情的记号，可能你会很不喜欢这个疤痕。但你可以把它当成一个记录，一个警惕。或者乐观一点，它也可以是一个装饰品，一个刺青。别再用工作麻醉自己，因为累坏的，始终是自己的身体，别人是感受不到的。要放开，真的不是那么容易；但如果你真的做到了，那就是垮了好大的一步。往后的日子，就可以轻松地面对了。"

When you are alone.....

What will you be think when you are alone.....
When i am alone... i will think a lot.
Lately... i have been really tight up with my works. There are days i need to work till 12 a.m.... and i work 7 days a week. Feel so exhausted...
A good friend from BW called me up few days ago. She is facing some relationship problem. It is about a third party between her and his bf. That third party is her bf's ex... and now they broke up... she has been very very sad.. asking me what she should do now? Honestly i have no idea... i am a failure in my own relationship also. what i can say is that times heal. trying to let go and move forward. That is the reality of life. You just need to go and face it yourself. No one can help you but you yourself.